My Journey of Faith

– Deacon John

My faith journey to the Diaconate was a little unusual. God calls each of us differently, and reflecting back, it is through God’s grace and my wife’s devotion to her faith that I am here serving God’s people today as a Deacon.  Looking back over my life I believe I had three separate callings from God, the first two I blew off thinking I’m not worthy. But God never gives up on us. In the end I just had to say yes to HIS plan. Here’s my story.

I grew up in Newark, NJ and attended St. Antoninus Church and School and was taught by the Sisters of Charity in the 60’s.  I then attended Essex Catholic High until my junior year when my parents could no longer afford the tuition. Wow, public school was certainly an eye-opening experience. I graduated in 1973 during Vietnam war protests, gas shortages, and high unemployment. There were no jobs available. So, at my mother’s suggestion I did what any red-blooded American boy would do – I joined the Army for 2 years to travel the world and ended up staying for twenty.

During the first half of my military career, I separated from the Catholic Church by not attending Mass, but not from my faith, I always believed. God’s plan comes into action again when I met my soulmate, my wife Caroline whose strong faith brought me back to the Church. We were married civilly at first, since I was previously married and divorced I had the previous marriage annulled. Then we were married in the Church of the Annunciation in Yonkers, NY. We were blessed with two children. Fast forward 26 years, after I retired from the military, I worked for a defense contractor for 10 years until I opened my own business. In 2016 I closed the business and retired for good, or at least I thought so. It all sounds great but there were bumps along the journey. My drinking became a issue and I hit rock bottom. The kids were grown, my career was ending before I planned and my best friends were named Jameson and Michelob Light. What was I going to do with my life? But once again by the grace of God my wife was there and I got the help I needed. Getting sober required creating new routines and a lot of apologies. And then I retired. Now what?

After retirement I was doing a lot projects around the house driving Caroline crazy. Our little Church, St. Monica is an older building in need of many repairs. Our pastor was looking for a maintenance person to do odd jobs around the Church. Caroline suggested that Father Alex speak to me and from that point on I spent a lot of time around the Church (the new routines). On a very cold day in early April, 2017, I was working outside while Confirmation was going on. I quietly went in the back door of the church to warm up and watched the ceremony. Suddenly, I felt as though I was having an out-of-body experience, very difficult to explain. I was troubled over the whole experience and couldn’t sleep or stop thinking about it. Caroline suggested I speak to a priest or deacon.   

          I made an appointment with Deacon Mike Principato who said you might be having a calling from God. Deacon Mike suggested I consider applying for the Diaconate. I told him he was crazy, because I was a sinner, and they wouldn’t want me. Deacon Mike was persistent, though. He never stopped asking me, so one day, after a lot of discernment and prayer on the matter, I gave in and we began the paperwork to submit to the Chancery. I expected I would not make the cut throughout the lengthy process. Well, I did make it and was ordained on May 20, 2023 with nine other brother deacons.

          God’s master plan was never on my bucket list, but He provided me with what I needed to bring me back to the Church (my wife) and has given me the tools (humility) to serve his people. I can honestly say that by serving God’s people in the assisted-living homes, the homebound, facilitating the OCIA and Grief Support Programs, presiding over baptisms, witnessing marriages, and conducting wake and funeral services are the most rewarding things I have ever done in my life, hands down, and I have done a lot in my life from traveling around the world (Israel, Vatican, Mediterranean, Asia, all over Europe) a safari in Africa (Kenya), to sitting in board rooms for major defense contractors, to owning a business and witnessing my children being born. God knew what I needed certainly more than I ever did. I just needed to say Yes to His calling, to His plan which was far different than mine.

          We all become disciples of Christ at our baptism. God might be calling you. God’s ways are bigger than our ways and you might have the talents God is looking for to serve his people. There are many different ways to serve the Lord. Discern and pray on it and I encourage you to speak with a priest or talk to a deacon. God’s ways are not our ways. Remember, you are not alone, God will guide you on Your Journey of Faith as he did mine. – Deacon John